Conversion Therapy Picture 2

The Well-Being of Youth Shouldn’t Become a Zero-Sum Battle

The Church opposes conversion therapy—unless you change the definition. Recently proposed rules in Utah could make ethical and helpful therapies illegal.

The well-being of youth and children is — and should be — common ground on which everyone can stand. We all want children to thrive and find joy.

That’s easy to forget in an environment of “us-versus-them” rhetoric where so much important nuance is lost. This is certainly the case regarding many of the reactions to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints’ position on a proposed “conversion therapy” ban.

To read some of the headlines — “Mormon Church Opposes Utah LGBTQ ‘Conversion Therapy’ Ban” — or to encounter some of the statements made in response to the headlines — “It’s hypocritical to preach compassion while condoning this hateful and failed practice” — you’d be forgiven for thinking that the church does, in fact, embrace conversion therapy.

In reality, it doesn’t.

The church has publicly spoken out on conversion therapy, denouncing “any therapy including conversion and reparative therapies that subjects people to abusive practices in Utah and around the world.”

And for several years now, the church has stated on its “Mormon and Gay” website that it is “unethical to focus professional treatment on an assumption that a change in sexual orientation will or must occur.” According to reporting, the church was even involved in shaping some elements of earlier legislation seeking to ban conversion therapy in Utah — HB399 — which failed to advance out of committee earlier this year.

In the church’s most recent comments addressing a proposed psychologist licensing rule banning conversion therapy, it once again made it clear that “it does not support therapies that seek to change a person’s sexual orientation.”

The well-being of youths and children is — and should be — common ground on which everyone can stand. We all want children to thrive and find joy.

So where’s the disconnect?

While there has been a growing consensus around concern with conversion therapy, that consensus hinges on a particular understanding of what conversion therapy means. When the words are defined in a manner that goes beyond their most plain meaning, people are no longer referring to the same thing — and thus, a change in response should come as no surprise.

That’s what appears to be happening here.

In other words, the story is not that the church was content with Utah banning conversion therapy one month and now is against it the next, but rather the proposed ban on conversion therapy has changed in its scope. Whether you support conversion therapy or you oppose it (and much depends on the definition of conversion therapy), the church’s Family Services’ public comments on the proposed ban constitute a reasonable effort to both understand and engage a complicated and (sometime contested) issue.

Certainly, attempting to reduce the church’s balanced approach to an “oppose” or “support” soundbite does a disservice to the public and those who seek to similarly engage in good faith. Nor should the thoughtful positions of advocates or others who have raised their voices be reduced or dismissed. We all need to resist the impulse to assume the worst or jump to unfounded conclusions when encountering opposing perspectives.

In line with this, the church’s Family Services’ comments begin by acknowledging “the good-faith efforts of those who drafted” it and go on to pledge the organization’s full support in achieving “the goal of protecting children and youth from abusive conversion therapy practices.”

The letter goes so far as to express “regret” that Family Services “cannot support the Proposed Rule in its current form.” This is hardly the sort of strident stance that some have represented in the public arena. The Family Services letter makes it clear that the organization’s own therapists “do not provide conversion therapies,” but that they do feel it’s important to raise cautions about overly-broad rules in areas where research is still unsettled or ongoing.

While the letter’s drafters don’t endorse any specific studies — and take pains to acknowledge the complex nature of the literature — they nonetheless point out that some young people’s experiences with gender dysphoria do not always persist “when a ‘watch waiting’ (therapy) approach is taken.”

Certainly, attempting to reduce the church’s balanced approach to an “oppose” or “support” soundbite does a disservice to the public and those who seek to similarly engage in good faith.

Again, the church’s Family Services’ letter makes it clear that such studies are not determinative. But, in some ways, that seems to be the point — they don’t want the state to rush into overly broad rules when information on some subjects is still in its infancy.

Complex matters demand caution and prudence. And a surprising degree of common ground can be found on many therapeutic practices associated with both benefit and harm, as demonstrated by the long-standing efforts of gay-affirming and more religiously orthodox therapists working together in the Reconciliation and Growth Project.

Meanwhile, the letter also raises questions regarding how practitioners counsel concerning behavior. While the letter makes it clear that prohibiting “true sexual orientation change efforts for minors is appropriate,” it also states that the proposed rule, “defines ‘sexual orientation’ to include not only ‘gender patterns in attraction’ … but also ‘behavior.’” In short, if a young gay man watches a significant amount of pornography and wants to change the behavior, the letter contends, the rule’s language could restrict “appropriate and ethical” practices, such as “provid(ing) reasonable therapies to assist a client in modifying behaviors and expressions that the client has identified as inconsistent with the client’s own self-determined goals and self-defined well-being.” This is also relevant to therapeutic efforts to help LGBTQ minors integrate into their faith communities, or helping adolescents who wish to remain abstinent.

The Family Services’ letter provides a studied approach on a sensitive issue. It’s lamentable to see so many in the conversation dismiss these sincere efforts at nuanced understanding so essential for constructive dialogue. Sound policy that truly helps children requires therapists, politicians, scientists, LGBTQ advocates and religious leaders to come to the table in a manner that doesn’t reduce the other’s perspective into ready-made talking points. The theatrics of politics must never blind us from the real work of protecting and lifting young people, including LGBTQ youth.

About the authors

Jacob Z. Hess

Jacob Hess is a contributing editor at Deseret News and publishes longer-form pieces at PublishPeace.net. He co-authored "You're Not as Crazy as I Thought, But You're Still Wrong" and “The Power of Stillness: Mindful Living for Latter-day Saints.” He has a Ph.D. in clinical-community psychology from the University of Illinois, Urbana-Champaign. Jacob is a staff writer and Latter-day Saint Voices editor at Deseret News.

Hal R. Boyd

Hal R. Boyd is a fellow of the Wheatley Institution at Brigham Young University. He was previously the opinion page editor for Deseret News. He has a J.D. from Yale Law.
On Key

You Might Also Like

The Room Next Door Review

“The Room Next Door” is the latest example of arthouse social engineering.  The film is about a troubled woman, Martha, who in the midst of cancer treatments decides to commit suicide. If this bothers you, the film implies, it is because there is something wrong with you. This is all the more troubling, because the film, in many ways, is beautiful. It is directed by Pedro Almodóvar, one of the most acclaimed living film directors, in his first full-length film in English. And you can’t help but be taken by the beauty of it all. The film is suffused with the soft colors of the woods. Despite being an entire screenplay full of little except two friends talking, the camera work keeps the film alive and moving. And Julianne Moore and Tilda Swinton who play Ingrid and Martha once again give impeccable, engaging performances, that you can’t help but admire.  But all the beauty in this film is in service of a story that is decidedly ugly—but not self-awarely so. Our two main characters are old friends who met as young writers. Ingrid has published a best seller recently, where she writes about how she can’t accept death. On her publicity tour, she learns that Martha is in the hospital with cancer. She goes to visit her and reignite their friendship. We learn through the conversations that these characters aren’t bad people, necessarily, they just struggle to see a world outside of their own desires and consciousness. They have repeatedly avoided building relationships or having families. Martha does have a daughter. But she chased her father away, then lied to her about who he was her whole life, and then proceeded to be an absent mother so she could chase the romanticism of being a war correspondent.  Now that she is sick and dying, she notices that she has no one in her life. The movie comments on this like an unusual quirk, rather than the inevitable result of a life of bad decisions. We learn early on that cancer treatment can be a roller coaster with euphoric peaks, and miserable nadirs. During one such rut, Martha purchases a suicide pill, and decides she will kill herself. She reaches out to Ingrid and asks her to come on vacation with her, so that she will have someone in the house when she does it.  Ingrid agrees. And although she early on expresses some discomfort, she quickly respects Martha’s wishes to largely pretend nothing is happening. They have a lovely vacation in upstate New York watching old movies and reading books. While they are there, Ingrid reconnects with Damien (John Turturo) an ex-boyfriend of both hers and Martha’s. He is horrified at the state of the world, and seems to only live for sex (or to constantly talk about sex.) Damien is not a sympathetic character, and perhaps the audience is supposed to read that his unpleasant and helpless politics are akin to Martha’s helpless approach to life. If so the audience hardly has time to ponder it under a heavy heaping of affirmations about the power to choose, and the dignity to die.  Eventually, Martha does exactly what she promised to do. There is a brief police investigation where the officer (Alessandro Nivola) expresses concern that Ingrid would have knowingly not gotten help for her friend. A lawyer comes and helpfully tells the audience we can ignore that concern because he is a religious fanatic. This is the kind of movie that alludes to James Joyce not just once but three times. It is so pleased with just how artsy it is. And for a film with a message like “life isn’t worth fighting for,” the best comfort is that it’s so artsy not a lot of people will watch it.  The only people I would recommend watching this film is for those studying how society has devalued human life, and how good tools can be misused to harm people. The film is rated PG-13. It includes several normalized same-sex relationships, and some joking about polyamorous relationships. But obviously the biggest warning is the way it normalizes and glamorizes suicide. If you watch it with older teenagers, I would focus on questions about the choice that Martha made, and how family and relationships could have helped her make better choices. I might ask about how Ingrid could have been a better or more caring friend. One out of five stars. “The Room Next Door” will be released in theaters nationwide January 17, 2025.

Subscribe To Our Weekly Newsletter

Stay up to date on the intersection of faith in the public square.

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Pin It on Pinterest

Share This